Today, my girlfriend forced us to go to a mall that's an hour away instead of the nearby one. The reason being because she cannot risk anyone familiar seeing her with a boy. MBL.

Today, I went to an necklace store and it had random names on the necklaces. There was Bob, Mary, Lisa, Andrew, and many more. I failed to find an "Abhishek." on any necklace. MBL.

Today, my car stopped in the middle of the road. My uncle got his friends "AAA" (Triple A) card and told them that I was the card holders nephew. "AAA" (Triple A) totally fell for it and saved me. MBL.

Today, my Hindi teacher asked 14 Indian kids out of the 20 kids in our class how many of us were pre-med majors. When no one raised their hands, she said, "Chi chi, Tum log acche hindustani nahi hai." Apparently, in order to be a good Hindustani, you must go into Pre-Med. MBL.

Today, my new roommate asked me what I wanted to specialize in the medical feild. I told him I was actually studying finance. He assumed that because I'm brown I'm forced, against my will, to become a doctor. MBL.

I'm good friends with the guy who made this website. MBL.

Today, I told this hot white girl "Once you've had Persian there's no other version." It didn't work. MBL.

Today I told my mom that my shampoo bottle was empty. I came back into my bathroom later to find the shampoo bottle turned upside down on it's head. My mom said there is still enough shampoo for quite a few days. MBL.

Today, my girlfriends sister yelled at me claiming that I wasn't trying hard enough to get to know their family. I'm 18! MBL.

Today, my mom asked me if my friend was "of the gay?" MBL.

Today, my dad thought it was the funniest thing to call my short cousin with round glasses "Harry Puther." MBL.

Today, my mom used a coupon at the dollar store. MBL.