Today i went into the freezer to get some ice cream, got excited as my favorite flavor was in there, opened up the tub to find left over dinner mushed together. MBL.

Today, my dad went to Albertson's and asked the workers where the "crap" was. He was talking about crepes. MBL

Today, a roach got inside the kebobs my mom cooked for me for about a second before she killed it. She still expected me to eat the kebobs. MBL.

Today, my mom told me she'd be gone for about a week to my aunts house and that she's making me about 5 dishes of food and putting it in the freezer for me to eat. MBL.

3 days ago I ate my mom's Haleem. Since that day, I have used the shitter 6-8 times a day. MBL.

Today, my mom cleaned all the plastic forks and spoons that we ate with and put them back in the drawer for next time. MBL.

Today, I ate McDonalds and asked for two buffalo sauces. While I was only able to complete one sauce, I saved the other sauce in the fridge as back up. MBL.

Today, Rachael Ray was cooking Indian food on the Food Network. My mom immediately felt threatened and told me to turn off the television. MBL.

Today, my mom asked me what did one milk say to the other one in our fridge? "What is up dood?" She laughed nonstop for 2 minutes. MBL.

Today, my mom came home really pissed after work and went to the kitchen to cool down. MBL.

Today, I refused to eat what my mom made for dinner because I wasn't hungry. An hour later, she came storming in my room telling me how she feels that I don't love and admire her for what she does for the family because I didn't have her food for one night. MBL.

Today my uncle came over and my mom asked him if he was hungry. He said "No I just ate." She said "Are you sure? Have a little." He said "No no I am not hungry." She said "Just try a little I cooked it just for you." He said "No really I am too full." She said ok and left to go change, came back 5 minutes later and asked "Come on just have a little it is very good!" My uncle gave up and had some food. No one says No to my mom about food. MBL.

Last night I had curry and roti for dinner. Today someone asked me why my fingernails were yellow. MLB

Today, we ordered pizza for dinner. My mom drenched her slice with salt, pepper, and chaat masala before she ate it. MBL.

Today, my mom told me that if I don't cover my food before I put it in the microwave I will get cancer. She was dead serious. MBL.